4 WAYS TO KNOW A LADY BETTER

One great challenge men face is how to know the character of a lady early in a relationship. It is a knowledge that will help you adapt to her idiosyncrasies for a better relationship. It will also help you decide to go on with the relationship or quit. Here are four ways to know a lady better.

#1. Through Her Friends

If the lady you intend to marry seems to be hiding her real self from you then study her friends. Birds of a feather flock together. Therefore the kind of friends she keeps is a reflection of who she really is. This is one good way to know her better especially when these people are her old friends. Engage her friends in discussions; ask for their opinion on a variety of issues and you can be sure they are not far off from your woman’s opinions on those subjects especially when same opinions are held by more than one of her friends.

#2. Close Observation

Upon close conscious and careful observation over a period of time you will begin to see some of her hidden traits – both good and bad ones. This you can do while interacting with her say over lunch and during discussions. Observing how she relates with other people at home, church, at the shopping centre, or even when she doesn’t know you are in the vicinity will reveal a lot about her. Though she will do her best to put up a good behaviour whenever you are around, you can be sure that there are moments you will catch her off guard.

#3. Discussions

There is nothing that reveals one’s personality than words from the person’s mouth. Ask her several questions while discussing and her responses (if sincere) will reveal her perception on different subjects. To cross check her answers, ask her the same or very similar questions at different occasions and check for consistency in her answers. Inconsistent answers means that there is a lie somewhere. For instance she might tell you at one occasion that her father is an engineer and at another that he is an accountant. Or that she was born at Akure and at another time she says she was born in Lagos. Consistent answers portray her sincerity.

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#4. Opinion of Others

Find out what people around her think of her. What does her friends, colleagues, siblings, etc. think of her? Do they see her as sluggish, lazy, untidy, unwelcoming, courteous, fun to be with, nagging or proud? Though there might be sentiments in people’s opinion of her, you shouldn’t wave off these opinions. You need to further confirm their authenticity. I was once involved with a lady and I decided to try find out things from her cousin. So I asked her, “Will you advise me to marry your cousin?” And she said yes. Not satisfied, I asked again, “if I am your brother, will you advise me to married your cousin?” then she looked me in the eyes and said no. I asked why, and she gave me some good reasons that related to her cousin’s lifestyle and background which I didn’t know.

(Culled from the book, Things You Should Know Before You Say I Do)